>Strangest Gift Ever

>Yesterday, I got the perfect response to the question, “What is the strangest gift you have ever given / received?” But first, you will need some background. I’ll try and be as brief as possible. September was exhausting. Between vaccinations, teething, and various small viruses, Andy did not sleep well. No one in my house slept well. October did not improve things. Andy got a really nasty bug the first week. Suzy had her surgery the second week. We passed Andy’s virus around while caring for Brynna and Lane the third week. The day after Daryl and Diana returned, I left for the CA state conference. I was supposed to be home on Monday morning but it ended up being a crazy Tuesday morning due to weather in Houston. Tuesday morning after I got home, I packed up my family in two very short hours, worked Suzy’s Fall Fest, and we all left for our “vacation” at 1:15 pm. While in Seattle, I worked conferences in Portland and Seattle and had lots of family fun. This is my “quiet week” before I head out to Denver / Salt Lake on Wed. I return Saturday and Rob leaves Sunday for the week long Developers conference in LA. Yes, yes…. this is my busy season. 🙂 That’s the background. A few more little details… Suzy is a super strong willed child who does not eat much. I also let her wear a pull-up on the plane. I did not want to face an airplane potty on a four hour flight with a one and three year old. These two points are foundations for what transpired next.

When we returned home, Suzy decided she was going to really test the limits. We had a clashing of the minds, if you will. I decided I was no longer going to be a short order cook. She would help me plan meals for the week and make sure there was at least one item she would eat. I would give her two “tickets” to exchange for any two meals she wanted something special like Chicken Nuggets or Mac N Cheese. If she still had her two nuggets by Sunday, she would get something special. If her tickets were gone and she didn’t like the menu, she would be hungry.

She bulked, and I buckled down. By Tuesday, she was wetting her pants. At first, just in the evenings. Then, she was flat out refusing to use the toilet. Oh please tell me you are kidding. I had plans to start removing basic privileges such as wearing pants and sitting on furniture. I really believe in natural consequences and try and be super creative in my approaches. My rationale is if you can’t go in the potty, you will stay outside naked where it won’t create messes for me. Yes, I’m mean that way. But I have to be. Suzy is SPICEY. I did, however, want to ensure that it wasn’t anything medically wrong. Because, well, even I have a heart to some degree and won’t punish for actual illness. It’s part of the reason Suzy doesn’t eat. She’s had really bad reflux since a baby and I’ve always had a soft spot for her eating.

So, off to the Dr. office we go. Suzy has peed in cups since I was pregnant. You may recall a post where I couldn’t leave my OB appt. until we had both peed in our cups. So when she refused to pee in the cup, it was either behavior or a real problem. The nurse and I both suspected behavior. After what I consider fair warning and many chances to pee on her own will, we catheterized her. It was not pleasant. Just as I had explained to her. But, it wasn’t horrible either. I’ve cathed some of my own patients on a daily basis. It really doesn’t hurt, it’s just scary.

The initial results back state that there is no infection. So, Mommy Boot Camp was about to ensue upon arrival back home. However, surprisingly, she was “cured”. She hasn’t had an accident since. She even stated a few hours later. “Mommy, peeing in the potty is much easier than sticking a tube in my bum.” I agree. 😉

So, the point of this story. We went to Picture People yesterday because I had a great coupon. To my surprise, Santa was already set up. And no lines. So, up the kids go. What did Suzy ask for, you ask? Why, she perked right up and said she wanted a pink potty for her babies. And then she looks at me and says, “And what was that tube they put in my bum called, Mommy?” I reply, “A catheter?” Suzy: “Yes, a catheter. I want a potty and a catheter.” Santa got this look I can’t explain and asks, “You gonna be able to make that happen?” Why yes, yes I can. I have several docs in the family and her Uncle Andy is a pediatrician. We will make that work. I simply can’t wait to tell this story for many years…. post Christmas. Seriously, I keep saying it. Suzy is destined for the medical field. 😉
Suzy, you are such a challenge. I do, however, want you to know that this little episode has really brought me to my knees in prayer. I can’t imagine trying to raise you without The Lord’s help. I love you so much, I will get calluses on my knees if I have to. I promise to discipline you out of love and respect. However, I also promise you may not like it and it will be creative. 😉

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4 Responses to >Strangest Gift Ever

  1. gwyneth says:

    >I have to think that Santa will regale his family with the "you will never guess what this one kid asked for" story for years to come. I'm glad she is back to using the potty though. Love you!

  2. >Totally hilarious! Aren't kids the funniest. The other day my mom was having a dinner party and one of the people present asked her if she likes eating her veggies. She said- extremely loudly and proudly, "Oh yes, I love veggies! They make me have snake poops!" I nearly wet my own pants laughing so hard!

  3. >Praising Got with you that Suzy is back to using the potty (and not just because I am taking care of her this week)! I thought about you and prayed for you all weekend.

  4. >Marti, you are a rockin' awesome Mommy! I may be coming to you in a few months for advice!

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